How Not To Speak The Language

Before I get to my first experience in a non-English speaking country, I must briefly tell you about yesterday.

My cousin Faye put me in contact with her cousin Alisa, who has also traveled the world. She was very helpful in showing me around and providing me with a little bit company. I kind of made my last day in London my cultural day with art galleries and a play. I went to the Manet to Picasso Exhibit at the National Gallery. Then I went to this awful play about Olaudah Equiano. I don't even want to waste your time explaining all the things that were wrong about it. Note to self, when "African Snow" comes to DC, SKIP IT!

For the past week I've been trying to learn some simple french travel phrases. Simple things like, "Do you speak English". I had brought a phrase book from Borders and downloaded a couple of podcast lessons to listen to on my Ipod. I was practicing these phrases on the train ride to Paris and the flight to London.

When I get to Paris I went immediately to the subway desk to buy my ticket. This was my moment to show that I was a true international traveler. When I got up to the desk the words that came out of my mouth were, "Do you speak English". Now, the first rule in speaking to someone of another language is never ask them in your own language if they speak your language, they will never understand.

Needless to say I walked away felling like a fool, but I learned my lesson. The phrase is "Parlez-vous anglias?"